Stop whining, empty nesters. Your child going to uni is not about you | Barbara Ellen

Why are parents hijacking their kids’ experiences to put themselves at the centre? It’s not healthy

As a fresh contingent of British kids gears up for university, who should we be most concerned for – them or their parents? I ask because sending a child off to university seems to have morphed from an exciting rite of passage (for the child) into some dark, angst-ridden melodrama starring the parents. How do they feel about it? Are their hearts broken? Will they cope?

This is usually accompanied by emotional accounts of parents staring forlornly into their child’s empty bedroom, perhaps weeping on to a favourite toy from childhood, or bravely talking about taking up new challenges to “fill the void”. What emerges is a sense almost of competitive empty nest syndrome. “I’m sad about my child leaving for university.” “I’m even sadder.” “I’m practically suicidal.” And on it goes. Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the most bereft of us all?

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from Children | The Guardian https://ift.tt/2PyUwiH